some snapshots :)

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trusting in the 180s

Heading into our fourth month of ministry and end of the school year, we're being forced to evaluate the progress & obstacles we've encountered since we arrived. We're also re-evaluting our mission and vision in order to ensure we're on track or work on implementing necessary changes. Well, after a team meeting a few weeks ago, we all learned that changes were the order of the day. Layo, the National Director, had been praying about/discussing/contemplating our current reality as a team of 10 spit across 4 campuses spread out in San Salvador. My team of five is often faced with feeling like we're not making much of difference - the challenging staff can leave us seeming hands-tied...wheels spinning... The other team of 5 is struggling with feeling stretched-thin, responsible to take over an existing ministry and weekly meeting, while launching a completely new movement on a wealthy, post-modern drenched campus. Now these obstacles aren't anything we can't handle - especially when we're trusting God to do big things in this country - but they do threaten to cripple our strategic vision.

After talking with our team leaders, Trevor and Kristen, Layo has decided that right now - the best way our STINT team can be most effective and strategic is to focus on one campus - Matias Delgado - to build up a model movement that will be the foundation for building up movements on other campuses. It will eventually act as a kind of training model for the staff on the other Universities.

Matias isn't one of the two campuses that my team of 5 has been working on - so this month will be a prayerful one for us as we prepare to be learners of the campus come January. But our team of 10 will finally be united and under the same schedules (Monday-Thursday 9-3; Staff meetings and Admin stuff on Fridays). A few current realities for the campus are: It's the wealthiest in the country - it is comprised of wealthy students (or, future leaders of El Salvador); Religious views are very "western," post-modern beliefs permeate more abundantly than the other campuses; there is no established movement or national staff currently working on this campus.

This is an opportunity for us to start fresh. New campus (for half of us). New team. New students. New ideas. A time to inspire a stronger partnership and have a more focused mission and vision.

Our biggest question was what happens on the 3 other campuses we've invested these past months on? What happens to all those students? Each of those campuses has national staff working on them (there are 6). We don't plan to let go of those friendships and relationships. Our goal is to keep in touch and continue building them up in their relationships with Christ - but to also connect them with Staff. We HAVE to trust in the Staff here and their ability to continue pouring into these students. To give them resources and to encourage them to be involved in their campuses growing movements. And trust that God is still on these campuses and will be working in and through these students for his glory!

For me, the thought of leaving students has been the hardest... but yesterday as we made plans for a beach day with some students during their Christmas break, I was filled with assurance and peace that we aren't abandoning them. That it will be possible to still be involved in their lives. Yes, it will look different, but I know that God doesn't need ME there to make changes in these students lives. To draw them closer to Him. So now, I am clinging to the truth that God's plans and bigger and better than my own. And that I can be obedient in taking this step of faith with my team.

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hearts renewed

First off, I sincerely apologize for the lack of updates lately...the past 2 weeks have been a whirlwind of craziness...
Last week all the presidents from Central America came to El Salvador for some conference of sorts, which coincidentally resulted in most of the major roads around our homes being closed. So we were on campus only 2 days last week. Wednesday night we got to go to a Hillsong concert with some students. It was in a large covered stadium with aweful sound quality and lots of high schoolers...The best thing about the evening though was our friend Rosa. We just met Rosa about a month ago -by the grace of God. She had just made a pretty life altering decision to turn her life around and back to the Lord. She speaks near perfect english and has been such a blessing to meet with, talk with, and really just encourage in the Lord. Anyways, she came with us to the concert that night, and skipping the details was basically just broken before the Lord there. She has a lot of stuff to deal with right now, but God is working in her heart so much and it's so exciting for our team to see! Please keep Rosa in your prayers as we start bible study and discipleship with her soon...

Thursday we had a chance to go to una playa - Costa del Sol - with some other students and their family friends. What a beautiful day! This beach was more similar to CA beaches than the last cliff enclosed cove we visited... there are houses lined up on the sand...there's no real public area. It was so wonderful to just get out in God's creation and enjoy fellowship with one another! (I'll have some pictures on facebook soon!)

Friday was Halloween - not a holiday widely celebrated here. We saw a couple kids dressed up at one of the "elite" outdoor malls...but other than that, trick-or-treating was nowhere to be found. Saturday, however, was Dia de los muertos (day of the dead) which is celebrated in some of the smaller rural towns around the country. Layo and Luchi invited us to Luchi's hometown where they had a celebration/parade. We ate at Luchi's sister's house and just walked around the quaint town as kids ran past us with kites and raced each other on their bikes. A part of me always longs to stay in those communities - ministering to the less fortunate. There is just something about those towns - it's peaceful, yet so welcoming and warm...
Well, we witnessed our fair share of craziness that night with kids dressed up as screaming brides and headless preists pulling burning wagons with fake dead bodies. The morbidity of it all was offset by cute toddlers in angel costumes, teenage girls nominated for city "queen" sitting on a stage, and some free molasses soaked pumpkin they handed out in the middle of the town park under a gazeebo. It really did make us feel the most Salvadorian since we've been here as we could see how the culture is entwined in the daily lives of the people.

I know I know...it sounds like we're doing a lot more playing than working...and that may just be correct this past week and a half - but it's also encouraging and exciting for us to know and experience this culture we're living in and ministering to. Hanging out with students connects us to their lives and makes us more a part of their community than simply saying "hey" on campus ever could. And visiting these towns gives us such an accurate portrayal of who these people are and where they come from.

This week Deb and Dan Goodson (a staff couple that used to be on the SLO campus but now is pioneering ministry at Berkley) were here this week to basically check in with everyone/everthing and simply encourag us in all that we've done...as well as give us resources and tools to continue moving forward. What a refreshing time it was for everyone - and SO good to get an outside perspective. Since we are the first STINT team to tread Salvadorian grounds we are taking care of so many of the details that will be crucial to the success of future STINT teams. Of course that isn't our overall focus, but it's our strategy. Either way - we can easily become discouraged in thinking we aren't making a difference and only seeing small day-to-day successes. But the Goodson's gave us some 'gold stars' and encouraging words that made us all excited to continue on...looking at specific strategies and evaluating our personal motivations...I could probably post a whole blog on this week..and maybe I will. But..right now we're all definitely in a place of renewal and are simply ready to go out and conquer!

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Well - we've been assigned our roles. In regards to Christmas Conference that is. Brandon and myself are in charge of the big meeting, discussion groups, and MCs. We also have pairs working on schedules, quiet time resources, free/fun time, worship, publicity, and the Friday night party. Yes, that's right. Party. It's gunna be awesome!! We're so excited and already had our first meeting to talk run through details.

Today is Friday - usually my team's craziest and longest day because we have staff devotional/worship/sharing in the morning, a time of waiting for the other team to get out of their meeting, lunch in whatever harried form that may partake, some crazy time at home getting out stuff together, puzzling, taking naps, etc...then off to UTEC, and topping it off with our student leader meeting. Today included most of those things, but somehow - it was awesome. Not tiring. It revived me (praise the Lord that I'm an extrovert!). Kristen and I had great conversations with a couple girls from school, and our student leader meeting was somewhat student led (and got out before 10:30!!), which is a blessing in many different ways...

Speaking of extroverts - this team of mine is somewhat obsessed with the Myers Briggs personality test...you know, the EI-SN-FT-PJ one. Well, turns out - I didn't remember what my four letter alias was when I took the test four years ago in an Organizational Behavior class, so I took the test again, skeptical of any legitimate results. Well, results are in - I'm an ESFJ, otherwise known as "the performer." I'd go into details, but I'm sure I'd bore you, going on and on with details all about me! I must admit though, I think I've turned a new leaf and have come to love and accept who I am! haha...While it does have its self-analyzation pro's, it's become more of a huge joke among the team (oftentimes a necessity for our sanity!)

Well, we've figured out how to convert our living room into a movie theater with bomb speakers and a projecter, so I'm off to enjoy the rest of our night together :) Blessings galore!

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exciting news!

So we found out last week that Vida Estudiantil in El Salvador is hosting its first ever Christmas Conference! Christmas Conference in the states is basically a huge week of speakers, seminars, worship, evangelism, and fellowship extravaganza for all the campuses in the entire Pacific Southwest region. It's a big deal in the "Crusade" world, and is an awesome way for students - especially first years- to get excited about their campus, ministry, summer projects, etc. And it's really a great time of simply growing in the Lord, recomitting your life, and getting to come before the Lord in a real way. I went to 2 in my 4 years involved at Cal Poly and loved them. It was such an amazing time of renewal and refreshment for my heart and soul - as cheesy as that sounds...

Anyways, we're so so excited to be in charge of this. We have a goal! Something to work toward! Right now, we have a date. That's about it.

We're staring from the ground up. It's really awesome because we're not recreating a conference from the states. Yes, that's what we know and we'll probably start with those basics, but this is a two day deal, and our minimum desired number of students is 12. twelve. TWELVE. that's tiny. Teensy. nothing. And we know God can do huge things with this. We're going to aim for something more like 50. Really, we just want to trust God in all of this. We need to allow the Lord to have full reign...that our ideas and creativity and agenda would be His own. I'm sure I'll have lots more updates - because this is probably one of the (ministry) things I've been the most excited about in a while since arriving in this blessed country!

ps - thanks for your prayers all! I love and miss everyone...let me know if you have prayer requests! <3

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tonight i almost risked the next five years of my intestinal health by sticking half of a grape in my mouth - only to have kristen lean over and whisper "this fruit hasn't been washed with vegetable wash"...at which point i naturally pretended to take the seed out of the grape, but instead spit the entire thing out and shoved it in my purse stealthily...all while smiling and holding a conversation in spanish. okay. maybe not that last part. but it's crazy - we wash all our fruits and veggies with this idodine 'vegetable wash' so it's legit to eat and doesn't give us parasites, ameobas, fun salvadoranian bugs.

i spit it out. none-the-less. i still stuck half of an unclean grape in my mouth. please dear lord don't let this be the death of me. if i'm going down, i definitely want to go down guns blazing at a pupusa buffet or something...

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ministry update

The other night Trev and Kristen met with Layo and Luchi (the national directors) and Alvin and Sylvia (staff we are working with on our campuses) to discuss basically everything that's not going okay on our team, on these campuses, with the ministry...not to sound like debbie downer, but it was a lot of stuff. Our team of 5 had been facing mounting frustrations in regards to communication, a lack of vision, a lack of unity, and a general misunderstanding on the part of the national staff in regards to our actual role here in El Salvador. Right now we really have no authority or empowerment with this ministry - and it's been quite crippling. Luckily, words were exchanged in love, gentleness, and grace with our staff. They have such great hearts for students to come to know Christ; we just need to rethink the best way to do that on these campuses.

Tonight we are going to do ministry (bible study groups) at UTEC, and then we're meeting with Alvin and Sylvia to discuss options for completely overhauling the Friday leadership "planning" meetings. This will basically be the first time we will get to voice our opinions, our ideas, and brainstorm together as a team in creating a vision for the student leaders. Needless to say - it's all quite exciting! We want to work together, to learn from each other, to hear each other...

I pray that God would be faithful to lay his will over our own - that we wouldn't pursue our own agenda or try to do this in our own power, but that we would be continually seeking the Lord for a wondrous vision for UFG and UTEC.

It's been an interesting journey thus far - and we're all pretty positive that there's a ton of work left to go, but we praise God for the work that He's done and is continuing to do here!!

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Psalm 51

Have mercy on me, O God,

according to your unfailing love;
according to your great compassion
blot out my transgressions,
Wash away all my iniquity
and cleanse me from my sin.

For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is always before me.
Against you , you only, have I sinned
and done what is evil in your sight,
so that you are proved right when you speak
and justified when you judge.
Surely I was sinful at birth,
sinful from the time my mother
conceived me.
Surely you desire truth in the inner parts;
you teach me wisdom in the
inmost place.

Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean;
wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.
Let me hear joy and gladness;
let the bones you have crushed rejoice.
Hide your face from my sins
and blot out all my iniquity.

Create in me a pure heart, O God,
and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
Do not cast me from your presence
or take your Holy Spirit from me.
Restore to me the joy of your salvation
and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.

Then I will teach transgressors your ways,
and sinners will turn back to you.
Save me from bloodguilt, O God,
the God who saves me,
and my tongue will sing of your righteousness.
O Lord, open my lips,
and my mouth will declare your praise...
The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart...

We read this Psalm (half spanish / half english of course!) this morning at our weekly devotionals with the other Crusade staff. I was so encouraged by David's desire to not only be cleansed of his sin - but completely renewed in spirit. Layo spoke about the ineffectiveness of our ministry when our hearts are fully in it; aren't 100% committed and submitted to the Lord.
After the last two stressful weeks, today was a breath of fresh air. I've been convicted of my (not so holy) attitude at times and sincerely want to be transformed like David. I know my sins are forgiven. I know the Lord washes away my iniquities...but we're called to go one step further. Full time ministry requires that my will be submitted before His thrones, in order that God's will can be made known and accomplished. This has been my prayer - and I hope it will continue to be! "...renew a steadfast spirit within me...grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me...and my mouth will declare your praise."

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a day in the life of...

it's been a month.

at first we were saying, 'we've only been here for four weeks!' now we're saying 'i can't believe we've been here for a month already!'

cliched, I know, but how time flies...

Since we still only have one car, our lives are continually in limbo; depending almost completely on Manuel/Ceci or Alvin to dictate our days or give us a ride to the office, to campus, to the grocery store, to get mail...We wait with uncertainty to find out what our days will hold - if anything at all. It can be hard and often frustrating not having a schedule yet - but I keep being reminded that this is year one. This is part of the pioneering stage. No, it's not all pretty. Much of it drives us crazy, or teaches us patience I should say...but in the midst of communication barriers and errors, disunity, uncertainty in absolutely everything we do, we can see the hand of God all around us. He's kept us safe. He's kept us healthy (well, not dying anymore at least!). He's blessed us with staff who love us like children. He's provided us safe homes in the midst of extreme poverty and crime...and He's working in students hearts on the campuses where we are starting ministry. No, we don't know what ministry will look like this year. No we don't know what ministry will look like tomorrow...but we do know that we are called to be here, and we are making a difference. Everyone who gave financially so we could be here is making a difference. Everyone who lifts up a prayer. Lives are and will be transformed this year.

Today on campus we met a girl named Stephanie...she loves to speak english and she loves the Lord. Right away we could tell that she was a leader. I always wonder how we end up talking to these students - and then she answered my thoughts and said 'God will bring the right people into your lives. I'm astonished at what you are doing here in my country, but it's good. And God will provide opportunities for you to speak to people who can make a difference.' Couldn't have said it better, Stephanie.

it makes me think of the cards we received from Layo and Luchi the first sticky night we arrived in this beautiful country..."Welcome to El Salvador...and to the most fun, challenging, life-changing, fruitful, and blessed year of your life." Amen!

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mister donut...

In El Salvador, they have this phenomenon called..."mister donut."

It actually got recommended to us from a couple of really cute, trendy girls from Evangelica University. And in a country where everything is a little sketchy - we take recommendations very seriously. We checked out a newer one at some mall a couple weeks ago and saw that it offered your usual deli array of croissant sandwiches, crepes, etc. as well as the ever popular brightly frosted donuts. It didn't really look like anything special or particularly apetizing, but we see them everywhere...

Last friday, after some time at UTEC doing ministry, we realized that we needed to grab some dinner before heading to another staffer's apartment for a planning meeting. We arrived in a parking lot chalk full of fast food places such as the greasy and satisfying pollo companero, KFC, and some random burger joint...as well as the [literally] jam packed donut man. No joke, the line was forever long. The other places - nothing. no lines. no people. So, of course, we went to Donut man, because that's where Alvin said we'd go. And, right now, we're pretty much doing whatever we're told and going where others go.

After a bout an hour and a half, we had all 'enjoyed' our interesting pizza/sandwich combo's that come with what else but, a donut.

Needless to say, we were pretty disappointed and our stomachs were NOT thanking us later. Tis all part of the experience...

I apologize for the sillyness of these blogs. I plan to get a legit one up soon! Right now, I'm off to bed. Much love to you all!

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it was bound to happen...

Our team has finally had it's first major bout of sickness! (the exclamation is not so much out of my excitement for these circumstances, but more because, well, we knew it would happen sooner or later...and it has)

3 weeks in and we're going on our second day of returning to good health. I was the first to feel it - flu like symptoms. Mostly aches, dizziness, chills...by the next morning it had spread to all but 2 on the team, now we're down to one healthy team member. Lucky Lauren. She gets to take care of us! I won't go into details, but we're getting a lot closer as we experience the after effects of whatever has dominated our systems together.

I've been eating more today and feeling a lot stronger...We're hoping we'll all feel up to campus ministry tomorrow. And despite not feeling my best, yesterday was such a blessing. I had some awesome time in the word and was encouraged by e-mails and some of the girls in the house. It's so encouraging to know that even being this far from home, God is taking care of all of us, and has been faithful to reveal himself to me and draw me close to him!

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blunder number 72...

so, being in a new culture with a different language and such, you can imagine the cultural mishaps that take place in our daily lives...

last night, we had one of these such experiences with Alvin and Sylvia (Sylvia doesn't speak any english, Alvin speaks only a little english) last night on the ride home from Gavidia.

A little background - Kristen is the female leader of our team and with a distinctly parental myers briggs of ESFJ has earned the nickname 'mom' 'mama' 'mother' 'etc.'

Kristen, sadly, was not feeling good last night and so stayed home from campus ministry. On the way back we proceeded to sarcastically joke that we could now 'party and have some actual fun' since momma wasn't around. Sylvia and Alvin then proceeded to laugh hysterically. We, of course thought this was funny as well...but Joe was quick to learn from Sylvia - through hand motions I might add - that the way we pronounced 'momma' did not mean mama, as we thought, but breast. Joe then had to turn back and explain to the rest of what had happened. We called Kristen breast. It was awesome. and there are many more to come i'm sure!

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and the fun begins

today kristen, marijke, and I headed to the boys' place for a morning of "productiveness" - and abuelita's cooking. The other team is at Matias University right now, doing some prayer walking and ministry start-up...whatever that may look like. We'll get updates from them tonight. Our team also starts campus ministry today. We'll be hitting up Gavidia University where there's a guys' bible study that Joe and Jeff will attend. Us girls will find something to invest our time in.

Before we go, we're hoping to have a short devo and time of prayer...It's so amazingly refreshing having to take every little thing we do to the Lord and place it in His hands. We are so useless without his power and spirit, and just the thought of going out on the campuses this year with God in us is so encouraging to me! This morning I read in Joshua about one of Joshua's daughters, Achsah, asking for a spring/well for the land he had given her. I began to think of how useless the land would be if there was no water - it wouldn't produce. it wouldn't sustain. it wouldn't provide for others. In the same way - what good am I with out the Lord? the spirit? the word? It's so crucial for me to be feeding my soul with these essentials in order to be effective. I praise God that he chooses to use us despite our complete lack of ability to do anything without him!

So if you have a second, would you lift up our teams as we embark out on the campuses this week? And that we'd be continuously leaning on the Lord in all we do :) Love you all!!

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Our Brady Bunch-esque team picture! This was at the
sweet coffee gardens we visited last weekend

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On our way to Vida Estudiantil (Ve!) - the weekly meeting at Evangelica University with Andres (Manuel and Ceci's son)

Lauren, me, and Bean. Roomies forever! Or at least through the year :)

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Settling in and Thunder Storms

It's hard to believe a week and counting has gone by...Today is Friday and we arrived last Tuesday! Our days have mostly been filled with errands - stop by the mall, by the bank, by the post-office, by the schools, by the mall, by the bank, etc. But I feel like I'm already getting accustomed to the uniquely odd characteristics of this beautiful country. There are things that I would think should make me uneasy or feel unsafe - like the copious amounts of razor wire on top of buildings, or the random guards on every corner carrying guns...Yet I feel so at peace here.

Despite the fact that we are living in one of El Salvador's wealthiest communities, I'm very much aware that this is a third world country. And my team and I have been called to be servants here - to the staff, the students, and the people we come into contact with everyday. It's really no different than what we are called to do back in the United States, it's just that here, it has become our sole purpose. And there's a language barrier...Pero estamos aprendiendo! (We're learning!)

We attended our first staff meeting this past Monday morning at the Campus Crusade office building where we had a time of worship, a devotion, and prayer requests/testimonies. Kristen and Trevor then announced how our teams would be split (There are 4 campuses we will be doing ministry on this year and so our team decided to be spit in two and each team would be responsible for 2 campuses). On the Evangelica/Matias Campuses where we had already participated in a weekly meeting, the team members are: Trevor, Brandon, Lauren, Bean, and Brenna. Myself, Kristen, Marijke, Jeff, and Joe will be on the 2 other campuses: Tecnologica/Francisco Gavidia which are decidedly less affluent and closer to our equivalent of state schools. When we first learned of this split, we were all a little bummed out - myself included - mostly for a variety of reasons involving team unity. And after our team had our first meeting with the staff from our campuses, our hearts were torn. On one hand, we were so excited to finally be getting started and desiring to come alongside the staff and help in anyway possible, yet on the other hand, we realized that our schedules would look different than the rest of the team, and the inspiring vision that Layo had previously cast in regards to reaching the top leaders and future leaders of this country seemed to not apply to us quite as much...

After some evaluating, team discussion, and time to process - we realized that no matter where we are serving this year - we are here to do just that: serve. And God obviously has a purpose in putting us 5 on those 2 campuses. We may face a few extra obstacles (with language/students' availability and reliable transportation/distance to travel...) but God is fighting for us. He has put us here for a reason bigger than any of us can even begin to imagine right now - and ALL of us are so priviledged to be working for the God of the Universe. A friend of mine left me a wise reminder before I left - There will be great successes ahead - they might not all be easy, but all the stuff that matters rarely is.

It's raining right now. again. It rains a lot in El Salvador - it's the main reason why the land is so lush and green. I know we'll have a lot of rain in our ministry this year. It's inevitable. God doesn't promise an easy life - especially a life fully committed to following after Him. We're going to have to fight...but God is fighting with us and for us. He is a God that desires to give good gifts to his children. And I believe He is a God that desires to do a mighty work in the country of El Salvador. My prayer right now is that I would be diligent to seek God and obediently fight - in all kinds of weather.

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To the left is a the view out one of our upstairs windows...one of many volcanoes in El Salvador

Below is a church we saw while visiting a food festival and coffee plantations in the mountains this afternoon.

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We're Here!!!

We arrived two days ago...on the eve of the 26th to a warm welcome from the National staff and their children. Thankfully we had no flight, luggage, or customs problems! Us girls (6) are still trying get comfortable in our home, but it's not too hard - a four bedroom hacienda in a beautiful gated community with a great view of the city. I promise we're actually doing work!! The boys (4) have a two story townhome with a live-in maid. "Abuelita Julia." She cooks, cleans...we're trying to keep our jealousy to a minimum knowing the boys need her more than we do!

Last night Layo and Luchi - the national directors for the Central American Region as well as El Salvador - invited us to their home for a welcoming party. They have 3 sons. Manuel (a crack-up and our chauffeur) and Ceci are also on staff and have 2 sons as well - Andres (9) and Giovanni (19). Selegna is on staff as well. She's 29 and from Panama, but has only been in the country for 2 months! The people here are amazing. They are so kind, generous, and hospitable and are simply going out of their way to make us feel comfortable and to give us everything we need for ministry.

I've been so touched by their hearts to see the students of El Salvador come to a relationship with Jesus Christo...we are all so excited to see what the Lord does this year!!

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E-Mails!!!

Hi Everyone!!

So - here's the lowdown: I'll be using this Blog to write more regular updates and stories, post pictures and videos, etc.

But, I'll also be sending out a monthly - or so - newsletter with general updates and prayer requests! And it would be a GREAT help if I could send out most of those electronically. I have a few e-mails already, but if I didn't ask for yours, or you're pretty sure I don't have it, could you post it here so I can add you to my list? This simply means you'll be receiving my newsletter via e-mail and saving me a stamp! THANKS SO MUCH!!!

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